Inviting Three People I Don't Know to Dinner...(#2)

For a writer, the problem with inviting three people you don't know to dinner is that there are so many people you are leaving out. You worry that people will judge you not by whom you decide to invite, but by whom you decide not to invite.

One of the reasons I am continuing my graduate studies in writing popular fiction is to satisfy the creative urge and intellectual curiosity within myself. The dinner guests must also be people who would appreciate hearing about this undertaking, who would understand and possibly even challenge my ideas and ambitions. The possibilities are endless

I considered Jesus, for a number of reasons, not the least of which is the whole "water into wine" thing. But this seems like an obvious choice, and might be judged unimaginative by my peers. Plus, it makes the rest of the choices much more awkward. Who deserves to be at a dinner with Jesus, and yet won't pick a fight with him? And how do I go about steering him toward my educational career for our dinner conversation?

From a creative standpoint, a master artist such as Jackson Pollock might be good. I think we could talk about deconstruction, defying traditional forms, and blazing your own path. At the same time, he was known for being a loose cannon. I don't want my dinner marred by an unexpected scene.

Of course, as a writer you'd always like to talk to those who influenced you the most. I study martial arts, and the belt ranking system denotes "one who comes before." As soon as you are higher than a white belt, you are a teacher to those who are lower in the ranking system than you are. As a writer, my primary literary influence--the "black belt," if you will--was Stephen King.

Again, I face my own indecisiveness here. Sure, Stephen King is my all time favorite writer. But what about Stephen Dobyns, whose novel The Wrestler's Cruel Study combines philosophy, pro wrestling, and humor into a perfect reading mix? What about Frank McCourt, or Faulkner, or Salinger, or Hemingway? Heck, what about Don Pendleton, whose Mack Bolan series filled my teens with such bloody action joy?

And what about judgment from my peers, since writing is so subjective and there are so many divergent opinions on who is the greatest? What if people ridiculed me because I didn't pick Shakespeare, or Chaucer?

Even more dangerous, what if I found out that my heroes had clay feet? What if Edgar Allen Poe were an insufferable bore, a socially awkward nerd who couldn't carry on a conversation with a drink coaster? What if Sir Arthur Conan Doyle tried to seduce my wife, or Jane Austen collapsed in a hysterical mess in the corner and dessert was cold before we could eat? What if they told me to give up my dreams, or turned out to be racists, misogynists, or worse?

So, I had a list of those I could not invite, due to my own peculiar idiosyncrasies, even though they would be interesting people who would appreciate my pursuit of more writing education. But who could I invite, given that I want a predictable and entertaining party, where we can talk about writing and education but not get too serious or have the night drone on for five or six unendurable hours?

Then it hit me, as I stared at my collection of videos and DVDs. There are three people who enjoy creativity, humor, and entertainment. These are all an integral part of popular fiction, and contribute to my desire to continue learning more about the craft of writing. I also know, based on such short films as Three Sappy People and An Ache in Every Stake, that these three can really liven up a stuffy dinner. So, the three people I would invite to discuss my education are Moe Howard, Larry Fine, and Shemp Howard--better known as the Three Stooges. They took their craft, but not themselves, seriously. We could talk writing until it got boring, and then we'd wing some cheesecakes at each other. What could be better?

Inviting Three People I Don't Know to Dinner...

As every student knows, there are many others who came before to blaze a path for that student's academic career. This is absolutely the case for me, as well. Many people have contributed to my ability to reap the benefits of the Writing Popular Fiction program at Seton Hill. While so many of them are close friends, mentors and family members, there are also those whom I've never met who played a major role in my career and scholarly passion. Three of those people are Margaret Callaghan, Julia Quinn and Johannes Gutenberg.
If I were able to invite these three to dinner, we'd have much to discuss. First and foremost, I would thank them each for their individual contributions to my academic career path.
Margaret Callaghan was the author of the first romance book I fell in love with. It was titled Substitute Husband. I read this book when I was 16 years old, working part time at a nursing home. Before this time, I never knew the world of pure romance novels existed. These books became an obsession for me, and since then, I've devoured thousands of them.
After college, when I was looking at graduate schools and came across Seton Hill University's program in Writing Popular Fiction (WPF), I was thrilled to see that I could specialize in romance fiction. It seemed almost too good to be true that I could get a master's degree focused on the genre I loved. If it had not been for that one book by Callaghan, I would not have been able to connect with the program that encourages my love of and practice in the romance genre.
Julia Quinn serves a similar role as Margaret Callaghan does. Currently, Quinn is my favorite author. I've read almost all of her books (her current book, What Happens in London, is on my reading pile). She writes Regency romance with humor and wit, and I am aspiring to make my current work as intelligent and amusing as hers. My dream is to one day be printed by her publisher, Avon. I would enjoy telling her about the WPF program and my goals for it, and then hearing her thoughts about the program and my career.
Finally, before I could even thank Margaret Callaghan or Julia Quinn, I would need to thank the third dinner guest, Johannes Gutenberg. Gutenberg invented the printing press in 1440. Because of him, the publishing industry is what it is today. All writers owe him for our modern ability to mass produce books.
I would like Gutenberg to see what his invention had done, how it has affected everyone in the world. From the mass production of the Bible, to the rapid distribution of category romance novels, people the world over have benefited from the ability to quickly acquire printed text.
These three people have shaped the way my world revolves around the printed word. Gutenberg has given me the printed word, Callaghan introduced me to a loved genre and Quinn created a type of writing that I would love to emulate. To be able to thank them and share with them about my academic plans would be the gift of a lifetime. No, wait. They've already given me the gift of a lifetime – and I will use it in the Writing Popular Fiction program at Seton Hill.