tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1159126976391299129.post2493440571061506883..comments2023-04-11T10:53:35.328-04:00Comments on Project 4Word: SupportDeanna Sjolanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13804959226951956019noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1159126976391299129.post-30661688453631898742009-07-15T18:22:23.944-04:002009-07-15T18:22:23.944-04:00Wow, Scott. I'd chastise you for calling me ou...Wow, Scott. I'd chastise you for calling me out on my post but I brought up the subject. Honestly, I never thought you'd read it since you're reluctant to read anything I do write. <br /><br />You make valid points. I can argue why none of them work for me. I also make valid points, which wouldn't hurt you to acknowledge instead of attack. But since I started it, I guess that's okay. <br /><br />Just do me one small thing even if you don't see the reason of anything I said in my post. When I send you something, read it. Then I won't get pissed and write a 2 page ranting blog post about you.Deanna Sjolanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13804959226951956019noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1159126976391299129.post-25895959847133019892009-07-14T22:49:30.023-04:002009-07-14T22:49:30.023-04:00I would give the advice that people aren't lik...I would give the advice that people aren't likely to take something more serious than you take yourself. If the efforts are consistently just words, the support is likely going to be the same. I hope that doesn't come across as demeaning (non-writer guy here), but as you mentioned in your post you haven't written one sentence in four years that has contributed to a story arc.<br /><br />If a web designer hasn't made a website in four years, would people still consider him a professional? If a baseball player hasn't had a hit in four years, what would people think of his desire to really get better?<br /><br />At some point, you have to start the process yourself. Instead of waiting for a Caribou card, go to a lake and write at a table (or bring a chair.) Instead of going to a coffee shop, hang out in a mall food court. Take your laptop to a library and find a comfy corner. You don't even have to leave the house to avoid being in eyesight of cleaning - the rarely used "family room" downstairs is fully furnished.<br /><br />Once people see that you are taking your own efforts seriously, they are likely to work harder at supporting you to greater heights.Scott Lepschhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16705496514185329021noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1159126976391299129.post-52588807903984943602009-07-10T11:03:26.522-04:002009-07-10T11:03:26.522-04:00It's funny, I have ranted about how I would ju...It's funny, I have ranted about how I would just wish family memebers would leave me alone when I write. They mean well and try to to help me out when I can, but like Gary said, they don't get how we think. I have a constant line I tell my mother, "I just need a few hours to myself." She agrees, and not an hour later i get a call or a knock on the door asking if I need anything. Which just causes frustration and then makes it even harder to work.<br /><br />I think what a lot of people don't get is that while a majority of writers are introverts, writing isn't introverted. If they had a friend who meditated for 5 hours everyday, they would make sure not to disturb them if they didn't have to. But tell them you are writing, they think you can do that anytime and that you should come out with them for a while.<br /><br />It's mind boogling, and probably why I become more and more a recluse each day. And I think that at somepoint point those that are intergral in your lie will figure it out (despite how many times you have to beat it into them) or they just won't and have to find a way around that fact so they don't hamper your ability to create. Those that aren't, well, if you had to suddenly move to Batswana, both you and the pother people would have to deal with the change. Think of it just like that, just instead of a physical move, its a metaphysical one.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1159126976391299129.post-46774677003617883822009-07-10T00:42:28.972-04:002009-07-10T00:42:28.972-04:00Yes, yes, you guys are awesome. I KNOW this of cou...Yes, yes, you guys are awesome. I KNOW this of course! Just don't fade out after a couple of months like usual, okay? I need you to keep me grinding away!Deanna Sjolanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13804959226951956019noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1159126976391299129.post-80278852683517077742009-07-09T23:41:52.110-04:002009-07-09T23:41:52.110-04:00My support structure is pretty weak, actually.
Th...My support structure is pretty weak, actually.<br /><br />There comes a point when you have to review where you are in your life and make little sacrifices where you can to get those pages written. Maybe it's not getting together with friends on a particular night, making sure everyone (husband, family, and friends) understands this is your writing time and sitting yourself down and writing. Even if it's crap, it's something.<br /><br />As far as husband goes, it might be necessary to spell it out for him. "Tonight, you do the dishes, because I need to write." Yes, need to.<br /><br />Friends and family can only be supportive to a point. They may not understand this drive you've got. Honestly, very few people outside of writers, musicians, and other creative minded folk understand how we tick. They have a perception of "Writer" and how a "Writer" lives and how they write, but they don't understand how we, as writers think.<br /><br />I've had to realize that, though my friends support me in a "that's cool you want to write, but you need money to live" kind of way, they can't offer the words of encouragement that other writers can. I've come to believe that only writers (and a few amazingly special people) understand other writers, how they think, what they need, how they need to be spoken to, etc.<br /><br />The solution? You come to a moment when you realize that your best support structure are your writer friends. Us. Sometimes you have to back away from the friends and family who don't understand, and lean heavily on those of us who know, who've been there. There's no shame in that. There's nothing wrong with keeping quiet to friends and family about your dreams and talking about writing only to your writer friends. We understand. We know. We're living it right along with you.<br /><br />So if you need words of kind support, or a swift kick in the backside to get motivated, or someone you trust to read a first draft, let us know. We're here for each other.<br /><br />Happy Writin's!<br />Gary . . .Gary Frankhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08677227737584407580noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1159126976391299129.post-25605542229126442952009-07-09T20:27:49.445-04:002009-07-09T20:27:49.445-04:00We are your support group... if you ever feel like...We are your support group... if you ever feel like you need an affirmation, write to us. People believe writing is a magic thing and it is, but they can't believe that anyone they know is capable of it. Don't let them bring you down. You will publish and then they'll get it.Donna Munrohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10865966841329261583noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1159126976391299129.post-39709757930798508792009-07-08T11:58:19.220-04:002009-07-08T11:58:19.220-04:00My grove is already coming back, you know. It is f...My grove is already coming back, you know. It is frustrating and disheartening but I think in the end, you, me, or whoever is struggling with this needs to take a step back and say, "Hey, this is important to me and you need to get on the bus or I'm running you over." <br /><br />And honestly, the poeple I can't share this aspect of my life with are people who really don't know me that well anyway. Despite knowing me for YEARS. The friends I've madde since living in MN on my own are friends who understand. I guess that's all that matters.<br /><br />As for a schedule....do you really think that will work? It never has in the past.Deanna Sjolanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13804959226951956019noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1159126976391299129.post-30534916711236030362009-07-07T22:08:42.316-04:002009-07-07T22:08:42.316-04:00Wow -- this moved me. It hits close to home. I h...Wow -- this moved me. It hits close to home. I have a good friend who would make fun of me (seriously make fun of me) every time she heard that I was going to read or going to write. After years of this, I've had to pull away from this friend. Now, I'm not suggesting you do that, but it's the path I had to take with this one friend. She just didn't get how it was important to me. It still really bothers me. I mean, come on, who makes fun of someone for liking to read?!?!<br /><br />I'm lucky because my husband's a writer (in fact, that goody two shoes is writing as we speak).<br /><br />I think we should set schedules for ourselves. Would that help us?<br /><br />Make New Hampshire the state that gets your writing groove back.Natalie Duvallhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03790355926460420200noreply@blogger.com